每個人在網際網路上都是尖酸刻薄的,但是沒有人能像著名的美國犯罪小說家雷蒙德·錢德勒那樣有階級、智慧和遠見。在1953年寫給經紀人H.N.斯旺森的一封信中,錢德勒沉迷於一段精彩有趣的科幻小說的模仿,這段話擊中了每一個比喻和陳詞濫調é 型別的。哦,在拉里和謝爾蓋註冊這個域名的45年前,他把谷歌的名字丟了。
Did you ever read what they call Science Fiction? It's a scream. It is written like this: "I checked out with K19 on Adabaran III, and stepped out through the crummaliote hatch on my 22 Model Sirus Hardtop. I cocked the timejector in secondary and waded through the bright blue manda grass. My breath froze into pink pretzels. I flicked on the heat bars and the Bryllis ran swiftly on five legs using their other two to send out crylon vibrati***. The pressure was almost unbearable, but I caught the range on my wrist computer through the transparent cysicites. I pressed the trigger. The thin violet glow was ice-cold against the rust-colored mountains. The Bryllis shrank to half an inch long and I worked fast stepping on them with the poltex. But it wasn't enough. The sudden brightness swung me around and the Fourth Moon had already risen. I had exactly four seconds to hot up the disintegrator and Google had told me it wasn't enough. He was right."
They pay brisk money for this crap?
具有諷刺意味的是,錢德勒對科幻小說的嘲弄本身就很誘人:事實上,我被吸引來,想瞭解更多關於crylon振動和七條腿的Bryllis的資訊。我對測距腕錶電腦也很好奇,它聽起來很像今天的智慧手錶。
但這並不是錢德勒唯一一次尖銳(準確地)嘲笑即將到來的未來。在另一封信中,他向經紀人介紹了電視和電影行業的情況,指出了至今仍然存在的問題:
TV stinks to heaven and even the halfwits admit it, but it doesn't cost anything, and you don't have to put a shirt on and get the car out and find a place to park and sit in a badly ventilated theatre with the stink of popcorn turning your stomach.
...I'd like a TV show, who wouldn't, but not on any terms CBS would agree to. And if I got the kind of show I would like, it would probably flop. The private eye as such is dated. If you can't give him character and interest as a human being, you are licked. And TV can't. It hasn't the time or the talent and it is too much afraid of offending some jerk in Corn Center, Nebraska.
所以是的,我們可以把未來派和尖銳的媒體評論家加入錢德勒的榮譽名單。
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